Uni Advice: #FriendshipGoals

So, in the early hours of this morning my new flat mate and I were relaxing in my bed talking about how we met and looking back on first year as a whole. Now, it may seem childish but this can actually be hard. This is the first time for most people since primary school where you don't know anyone in an academic situation but luckily everyone else is in the same position. In some ways it's like primary school, you're dropped off by your parents and left to socialise with strangers that are the same age as you. So, just like primary school keep it simple. 

Firstly, say your name to everyone you meet and respond based on their response. If they reply in a friendly way ask them what course, what accommodation and where they're from. These are the most basic questions but usually from that short interaction you can tell if they want to be friends or at least acquaintances with you. This is specifically for girls: there's no excuse for your screw face. At this point in your life you would know if you've got a resting bitch face, so smile. It's not that hard. Get to know people who based on their appearance you wouldn't normally talk to. Yes, some people will be rude, one girl flat out ignored me when I said hi but most didn't. This is how I made the majority of my friends just by simply saying "Hi, I'm Jade". Start small with your flatmates. You're going to spend the majority of a year sharing your space with these people so find out about them.

Now, flatmates. I know some people get studios i.e. accommodation where they don't a kitchen or bathroom and in some universities people have room mates. So some of these points won't apply to you. But, for most of you you'll have flatmates. My first year accommodation was en-suite so I only shared a kitchen with my flatmates. For a lot of you, you’ve heard the horror stories of mouldy plates and bins with maggots because they haven't been taken out, but remember this is the minority. You've got two options when it comes to approaching flatmates. You can go in all guns blazing, scream and shout about how dishes have to be washed daily and make a bin rota for everyone. On one hand this could work, you could scare them into being clean, however, if it comes to a point where you're locked out of your flat and need some help they're unlikely to help. I avoided this approach, instead I decided to react if something happened. Yes, there were situations when screaming and shouting was involved but mostly it was ok. Just to be clear, you might not get lucky like me and get relatively clean flatmates but definitely be nice and only react if something happens because a lot of people even become close friends with their flatmates.

Arguably the most important friends to make are course mates. These people don't have to be your closest friends but they are essential to passing your first year with a good grade. Regardless of your course there will be ways that these people can help you. From doing group work together to sharing notes you’ll spend time with them. They are the ones you'll revise with and the people you will see for the rest of your time at uni. Now if you're lucky enough like me and make real friends on your course that's even better but you still need to know them. Last year I found my course-mates on Facebook, join the group chat on there and then when we got to uni someone changed it to a WhatsApp group chat. I don't even want to imagine how many deadlines I would have missed or questions that would have gone unanswered of it wasn't for that group chat.

As I'm sure you know at this point in your life making friends isn't even the hardest bit, it's keeping them. It's likely that the friends you make during freshers' week aren't going to be the friends you leave uni with, for me this wasn't the case. However, there are definitely some people that I no longer speak to. Everyone approaches freshers' week differently, some pretend to be someone they're not and eventually show their true colours. Avoid this. Being someone else never works out because unlike in college of sixth form at uni you have to be this other person 24/7. So, be yourself.

Finally, have fun. Yawn! I know but even though it's cliché it's true. You're at uni, you made it. Join random societies there's a society for nearly every interest and if there's not one for you then create one. Now, before I start sounding like a uni brochure societies are actually great, there are two types you should join: academic and social. The academic ones relate to your course, they're a great way to meet older years on similar courses to you so a good way to get advice and help. They also look good on your CV. The social ones are more about expanding your horizons and discovering what your uni has to offer apart from your degree.

DM me on twitter @heyheyitsjadee for more advice and good luck.

Yeah that's it.